Is Britney Spears a Good Mom? And Why Do We Care?

I knew I'd have to blog about this eventually and well, what a week for the Britster, so I'm bringing it up.

I feel sorry her as well as I am the girl in the back of the classroom rolling her eyes. No one likes it when a mom is having too much fun. I know, it's a double standard-- we all think K-fed (note the cheesy nickname just like the badboy firefighters I mentioned below) is a few steps lower than a scuzball and maybe we expect him to be a loser. But Britney, when she dropped her deadbeat husband and showed up on David Letterman with a classic bob, black dress, we thought-- yes, she can have it all, she will make a comeback...what a difference a few days make. It makes me want to take out my "Spear Britney" t-shirt and become that 16 year old girl I keep hidden down deep inside me.

Now, we've got her out in a Little Miss Sunshine t-shirt, which looks like she saved it from the teeth of a barbed wire fence. And the no underwear-- when is this a good idea when you're being followed by paparazzi 24 hours a day? I know if I had men with cameras following me around all the time, I wouldn't be giving them free snaps of my naughty bits. I mean, seriously, how much would Magazine X pay for such a thing? And to offer it not just once, but two or three times? It's a complete disregard for money management, I mean-- guard your assets.

I sound a little judgmental. But maybe I'm just disappointed or perhaps, a little judgmental. I'm not perfect, but I do tend to wear underwear 99% of the time and that one percent I don't? Well, I'm not in a skirt up to my waist and being followed by paparazzi. But on the road to enlightenment, I offer understanding to Britney for all her bad choices because I too made bad choices in my 20's. And I think there are quite a few of us who did.

Though thankfully in my 20's, I didn't have children who would ever have the chance to run across nekkid photos of crotch. I did have a wee-bit of wild side occasionally, though of course, I was working a 60-70 hour corporate job, so if I did go a little crazy, most likely it meant I rolling around on the floor with post-it notes stuck to my head and less of the chance I was anywhere sans Victoria's Secret.

So, I'm wondering, why do I care? I guess a part of me wants her to pull it together. I guess another part of me is getting too old for the world of the twenty-something. I'm 37 and I'm already subscribing to MORE magazine. I'm not 40, but in certain ways, I see myself more as a woman who doesn't need the attention I did in my youth. No longer do I need anyone to tell me I'm pretty, I know it. Oh, why is this so hard for women to say or to know? (Please, right now, remind yourself how pretty you are. You are.)

Unlike my twenties where I *relied* on a guy to remind me of all that was, to prove it to me by dating me, to validate me. Now? I could care less. And what's funny. I'm actually someone I'd want to go out with. Yes, I'd date myself--I know I sound insane, but it's true. I'm so much more interesting now. Back then, I was cute, I didn't have the loose skin that comes with childbirth across my stomach, but I was so less interesting.

I don't have any advice for B. or anyone here. We're all on our own paths and have our own challenges. In no way do I understand what's it's like to grow up in a world where you are known for your sexuality (I mean, I was the ugly duckling until high school and then, I was the granola girl in college, so yes, when I had the best body of my life, I was wearing gunnysack dresses and clothes I could run through daisy-filled fields in). So, that paragraph where I said I was judgmental, I'm going to take that back except for the not-wearing-underwear part of the decision (which really was just dumb).

I'm going to focus on my own world again and try to stay out of the celebrity gossip columns for awhile because the lives we're living as women and mothers are much more interesting. I know it doesn't always seem like it, but I'd much rather hear about a regular mom being caught without underwear because well, I don't hear about that much. Rarely am I at a PTA meeting to have someone say, "Did you see Kay in the Small Town Herald with her clam showing?" And if it did happen, *that* would be interesting, and you know, I'd be easier on small town Kay because well, we need a little excitement in our lives these days. We need to go commando every so often because we can and no one's going to photograph it.